Finding a melting point between compassion and paying the bills
It breaks my heart when I hear the story of elder abuse by their caregivers be it physical, mental, sexual or financial, it is unimaginable to think that you can abuse someone you have empathy for. Yet this is someone that demonstrated the spirit of compassion for care-giving and even won the heart of their interviewer before getting the job.
I was confused during an in-service about 2 weeks ago when a facilitator asked the question “why do you work in this place?” to make residents happy top my list of priority but it generally struggled to be mentioned at all and eventually found itself in the last position. The facilitator also supported the ranking because it is believed that you could as well make people happy elsewhere and earn more or less. Then I asked myself why should good pay be a priority in deciding where we want to demonstrate our spirit of empathy?
Compassion is a sense of shared suffering, usually concerned with a desire to alleviate or reduce such suffering; to appear like a succor to those who can no longer do what they are used to doing by themselves.
As a NOC shift medication care manager and supervisor I played vital role in dynamic dining experience years back especially when I could not find fillings for call-ins so I had to stay behind until after the breakfast. I was thrilled knowing that I ALWAYS have a smiling face, I wish they can make you train others, you are so gentle…all these words were really rewarding to me. Especially when I go to my resident’s room to acknowledge their call I felt great to know that they were feeling lonely and sad until I came in.
The big test comes when a resident offers a gift in appreciation of their perceived kindness. Personal principle, company’s policy, safety etc come jostling for a position and priority.
I cannot describe the relief and satisfaction I get uttering “THANK YOU I REALLY WILL DO BETTER WITHOUT ACCEPTING YOUR GIFT, I AM JUST DOING MY JOB”. Really! With bills to settle?
I strongly believe that the only way to demonstrate compassion is to be able to turn down a gift in appreciation of your assistance despite your financial needs.
Individual financial problems can be very challenging, the feeling of working but not able to pay bills can be depressing but the truth is that it is a choice to do care-giving. There are more paying jobs out there other than caregiving and like my supervisor said those little gifts could turn out to be theft for a senior in the early stage of memory issue.
Published by:
Ojo Akognon
CEO/COO Madesa In Home Quality Service
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/finding-melting-point-between-compassion-paying-bills-akognon-ojo
